9.19.2011

FSOT Prep Websites

So I have been chatting, reading all emails, reviewing blogs, FSO yahoo group, research all sites to find useful resources to help with studying.

Here are a list of worthwhile websites that I believe would help:

FSOT related

So my inbox have been blowing up since subscribing to the FSO related yahoo groups, but I came across a lot of useful information. In attempt to organize all of my FSO related items in one place, I am just going to repost them here. I found them useful and maybe this compilation would help others.

My test is on October 3rd - 15 days and counting... the anxiety from wanting something so bad and being emotional invested.

9.15.2011

Life Journey

It's been a while since I've revisited my blog! Life has been busy, work has been busier. And I finally finished my Masters in May. Now I am planning on my next endeavor with high hopes.. I've already started the process and will be taking my FSOT in October. It's scary considering how many people of have taken it and not passed, but I will keep trying. I've been thinking of joining the FSO since my undergrad. I finally feel ready to take the leap and try since I've grown and now have more experience under my belt to make me a more competitive candidate.

3.20.2010

Heavy Hearted


The heart, still healing, as the mind locks away the memories of each of you. Not a day had pass had I forgotten the promise I made. As I still feel your presence now & forever, rest in peace T.P., P.P., J.P., & V.P. 09.07.98.


Not a day had pass since I forgotten the promise I had made.  As much as living through each moment stubbornly believing that each of you should have had a long life to live - where each and every one of you were stripped of a life so tremendously precious.  I still keep it moving and will always keep a watchful eye over the love ones that you had left behind.  Today, as we celebrate the beginning of a new life...a life that will forever represent you since she is has that familial linkage to of each of you.  I am grateful for your presence as you walk with me through times of darkness.  I miss you and the days that we could have shared.

3.16.2010

Inner Demons

One chance . . .
To take and not speculate.
To fight for and not regulate.
just let go . . .
Without any inhibitions and see how far it'll take for you to get a chance to finally, not only see and believe, but to also breathe.

With every break,
tear,
and crack,
Follows strength.
A strength to toughen the skin you speak of,
with each scarring reminder,
an immeasurable courage it takes to face these inner demons.
The audacity to make it through -
where that ferocious, yet honorable determination supersedes it all.

As you walk on that rough road, with you are other fearless souls along with you. Things are not so desolate. Redemption does not correlate. . . with those that carry the responsibility of many. The end of the road must not be reached alone. For if it was at the bottom or the top, the battle, whether shared or internal, molds us. Breathe easy.

With those of the same passionate mentality, awake but in a dreamy state, we will break down those walls and make our own doors - instead of looking through the window, hoping or imploring for more, we just fight for, simply for the sake of our own. Why? Because we only got one . . .

1.09.2010

To all the Geminis






I'm not much a person that reads into horoscopes and the likes of that.  But I can't help but want to share my daily horoscope from my cell:


"There's no question, this has been a long time coming.  But today the change you have been hoping for so long is likely to occur, Gemini.  The enormity of the change may not be obvious, at least at first. But over time, you will look back on the events of today and see just how pivotal they were.  Keep your wits about you today, and seize any intriguing opportunity that comes along."


It's always nice to get nice and positive vibes my way.  


Much peace & love,
cat


P.S. I got the cutest Hello Kitty necklace yesterday in Japan town && I love it!  I'll show you all later. ;]

1.05.2010

Still my best friend . . .

We all understand the meaning of friendships.  Friends come and go in our lives, but whether they know it or not, they have somehow left some mark in our memories, hearts, and in a sense, molded a future self of ourselves.  For those that remain, well they become my mains, soul mate, boos, b.ef.eff, homeslice, and/or tripod material.


Letting go of a dear lover was one of the hardest decisions I made at the end of '09.  He has made a big and positive impact in my life and we mutually decided it was time to start our lives anew - to be young & free.  He possesses such a genuine heart and soul that at first glance, is mistaken for being a charmer, although he does have the skill to be a con-artist.  A charismatic person with the ability to connect with strangers and gain trust from people.  Like a magnet, he becomes a glue for the many people in his life.  This person showed what selfless love really means and how much of the world I deserved.  This was someone that understood that I had my dreams before anything else and I held it above everything else.  He supported me in my decisions of doing anything and everything for my family.  That although my sweat and tears for my family are sometimes not necessary and does not make any sense, he knew it is something I will always do without a second thought.  I felt so strongly that we are still so young with a lot of life to live and needed to be free to figure out what type of life to live.  He valued my opinions, thoughts, and criticisms - took them to heart, accepted them, and was also able to let me go.  Now that is the meaning of love.  For all that, he is still my best friend.  


Life is constantly challenging us to grow, learn, and evolve and I do believe he will one day reach his point of happiness and success.


It is so hard to find people that care about you and your well-being in this cold, unforgiving world and when you find someone like that, it is so important to keep them close - where we together will challenge the world as a team - complimenting each other and lending a helping hand, as a unit we regard each other like family - being there for each aspect of major life moments and giving real heart-to-heart advice.  There are many aspects of me that are complicated and I value those that can see me for who I really am and appreciate me for me.  You go through this world and on your journey you question the motives and intentions of each individual that show you kindness.  Being that I have such a determined mentality and high aspirations, a lot of people see me with strong potential for success.  Again back to my questioning, I test everyone in my life, I observe their manner and analyze their direction to make sure they are here for me, not to just catch a ride and like me, have the strength to fight their battles.  They say to surround yourself with people that are like you and/or compliment you - and I am an avid believer in this.  They must have drive, intelligence, beautiful inside & out, fierce with a work hard to play harder mentality, and lastly the desire to push those around them to reach that finish line.


I have a tendency to really love the people in my life.  I always want to make sure that they are happy and are doing well.  My thoughts are always with them and so is my heart.  I feel their excitement, and I can also feel their pain.  When I come across something that I think would benefit them, I will go out of my way to make it happen for them.  And for all that . . .


I hope that by being a part of the lives of those I hold close to my heart, that I somehow bring forth something to the table for them.  That having me as a friend would be good for them.  I am the supporter, the fan, the cheerleader, the advisor, and the loyal friend during the worst of times as well as times when they are at their best.  At times of tears, I am the shoulder with a box of tissues as well as the avenger to those that caused the pain, if it was a cause that could have been prevented.  Although I do not waste my energy on seeking payback, if it was right in front of me and was effortless, that poor soul will feel my wrath.  I am a lover, but I am also a fierce fighter that hold grudges until I am satisfied.  You wonder why some people do not really have real friends in their lives, sometimes not even a strong family connection - it tells you about their weak character.


I am blessed for the life I have and am grateful for the selected few who are a part of it.  For my family, girls, boys - they got my back - we will celebrate when we reach that finish line, but for now, get off that hype and hustle.  As we go on our individual journeys, together I hope we share more good memories and laughs. 


I like to end with this quote I came across:


As I look back on all that's happened..growing up, growing together, changing you, changing me -- there were times when we dreamed together, when we laughed and cried together. As I look back on those days, I realize how much I truly miss you and how much I truly love you. The past may be gone forever..and whatever the future holds, our todays make the memories of tomorrow. So, my lifetime friend, it is with all my heart that I send you my love, hoping that you'll always carry my smile with you, for all we have meant to each other and for whatever the future may hold.








Today is his birthday, and I dedicate this posting to him.