We all understand the meaning of friendships. Friends come and go in our lives, but whether they know it or not, they have somehow left some mark in our memories, hearts, and in a sense, molded a future self of ourselves. For those that remain, well they become my mains, soul mate, boos, b.ef.eff, homeslice, and/or tripod material.
Letting go of a dear lover was one of the hardest decisions I made at the end of '09. He has made a big and positive impact in my life and we mutually decided it was time to start our lives anew - to be young & free. He possesses such a genuine heart and soul that at first glance, is mistaken for being a charmer, although he does have the skill to be a con-artist. A charismatic person with the ability to connect with strangers and gain trust from people. Like a magnet, he becomes a glue for the many people in his life. This person showed what selfless love really means and how much of the world I deserved. This was someone that understood that I had my dreams before anything else and I held it above everything else. He supported me in my decisions of doing anything and everything for my family. That although my sweat and tears for my family are sometimes not necessary and does not make any sense, he knew it is something I will always do without a second thought. I felt so strongly that we are still so young with a lot of life to live and needed to be free to figure out what type of life to live. He valued my opinions, thoughts, and criticisms - took them to heart, accepted them, and was also able to let me go. Now that is the meaning of love. For all that, he is still my best friend.
Life is constantly challenging us to grow, learn, and evolve and I do believe he will one day reach his point of happiness and success.
It is so hard to find people that care about you and your well-being in this cold, unforgiving world and when you find someone like that, it is so important to keep them close - where we together will challenge the world as a team - complimenting each other and lending a helping hand, as a unit we regard each other like family - being there for each aspect of major life moments and giving real heart-to-heart advice. There are many aspects of me that are complicated and I value those that can see me for who I really am and appreciate me for me. You go through this world and on your journey you question the motives and intentions of each individual that show you kindness. Being that I have such a determined mentality and high aspirations, a lot of people see me with strong potential for success. Again back to my questioning, I test everyone in my life, I observe their manner and analyze their direction to make sure they are here for me, not to just catch a ride and like me, have the strength to fight their battles. They say to surround yourself with people that are like you and/or compliment you - and I am an avid believer in this. They must have drive, intelligence, beautiful inside & out, fierce with a work hard to play harder mentality, and lastly the desire to push those around them to reach that finish line.
I have a tendency to really love the people in my life. I always want to make sure that they are happy and are doing well. My thoughts are always with them and so is my heart. I feel their excitement, and I can also feel their pain. When I come across something that I think would benefit them, I will go out of my way to make it happen for them. And for all that . . .
I hope that by being a part of the lives of those I hold close to my heart, that I somehow bring forth something to the table for them. That having me as a friend would be good for them. I am the supporter, the fan, the cheerleader, the advisor, and the loyal friend during the worst of times as well as times when they are at their best. At times of tears, I am the shoulder with a box of tissues as well as the avenger to those that caused the pain, if it was a cause that could have been prevented. Although I do not waste my energy on seeking payback, if it was right in front of me and was effortless, that poor soul will feel my wrath. I am a lover, but I am also a fierce fighter that hold grudges until I am satisfied. You wonder why some people do not really have real friends in their lives, sometimes not even a strong family connection - it tells you about their weak character.
I am blessed for the life I have and am grateful for the selected few who are a part of it. For my family, girls, boys - they got my back - we will celebrate when we reach that finish line, but for now, get off that hype and hustle. As we go on our individual journeys, together I hope we share more good memories and laughs.
I like to end with this quote I came across:
“As I look back on all that's happened..growing up, growing together, changing you, changing me -- there were times when we dreamed together, when we laughed and cried together. As I look back on those days, I realize how much I truly miss you and how much I truly love you. The past may be gone forever..and whatever the future holds, our todays make the memories of tomorrow. So, my lifetime friend, it is with all my heart that I send you my love, hoping that you'll always carry my smile with you, for all we have meant to each other and for whatever the future may hold.”
Today is his birthday, and I dedicate this posting to him.